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Brad Wise
5 storytellers were given a daunting task—write a 250-word (or less) story explaining a random photograph. This is Photo Spark 1. This is story 4. This is Brad Wise with “Jared for the Win.”
To Whom It May Concern:
If you’re reading this letter, I guess you own my boat now. Do you even fish you sonvabitch?
I’m sorry. Despite what my wife said, I’m a good dude. I just want to know my boat is in good hands. If you have a minute drop me a line and let me know. Address on the envelope. Yes I’m at the Star Motel. Don’t get judgy.
P.S. She takes a little more oil than most boats. 20 ounces per 5 gallons of gas. Mix it right in. Drop the hammer. Go find some fish.
Good luck.
-Lonnie
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Dear Lonnie,
I bought your boat. I felt kind of bad about it because your wife was clearly acting out of revenge. I mean, she showed me pictures.
Anyways, thanks for the tip on the oil. You’ll be happy to know I fell for it. The mechanic informed me that only an idiot mixes the oil and gas with this engine.
Should I send you the repair bill?
-Jared
——————–
Hey Jared!
You can send the bill to your butt!
Also, don’t be so smug about those pictures. It happened. I’m not proud. The end.
-Lonnie
——————–
Lonnie,
My butt? Are you 6 years old? I gave the bill to your wife. Along with your address.
Yours truly,
-Jared
——————–
Jared,
She dropped by today. She yelled a lot and then we did it. Says she still loves me. I pretended to be happy. I get to move back in.
You win.
-Lonnie
Photo (Flickr CC) by Brent Marshall
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Brad Wise
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